Scattered Pieces of a Jigsaw

Our St Osyth Carer Group recently organised a creative writing activity.  Carers were invited to reflect on images of a clock, a flower, and a cup of tea and what they meant to them in their caring journey.

One of our talented carers, writing under the name Lynsey Rozee, penned a powerful and beautifully written poem that captures the emotional depth, exhaustion, and quiet strength of being a carer. Her words speak to the reality many face: the loss of time, the fading of relationships, and the longing for simple moments of peace.

Scattered Pieces of a Jigsaw

Summers spent in the garden,

Admiring the colourful flowers,

Time seems so full of promise,

We don’t know it will be gone too soon,

Scattered pieces of a jigsaw,

Each piece a different picture,

Each one of our experiences unique,

Yet drawing us together all the same

Each of us taking a step back,

Putting others needs before our own,

Caring for our loved ones,

By choice?, or by need?,

Trapped within our circumstances,

Making the best of what we have

Our relationships have changed now,

We’ve had to learn to adapt,

For some, days move slowly,

Endless seconds, minutes, hours,

A metronome of heartbeat,

A monotony of time,

An ever changing landscape,

Filled with the intensity of fear, hope, love, hate, anger and despair

Someone always needs us,

Our time is no longer our own,

There’s never time to visit the garden,

To take a breath of fresh air,

Smell a fragrant flower,

Or just sit and feast the eye,

Always needing to clock watch

Medication, food, endless reminders,

Never a moments rest,

There’s always another job to be done,

A cup of coffee evokes a memory,

Sharing food with family, cooking them a meal,

Drinking a drink whilst it’s still hot,

It seems so long since that was a possibility for me,

Relationships can wilt like a flower,

Feeling more like a nurse than a wife,

Putting their needs above my own,

Even when I am not well,

Every day putting on the mask we wear,

Making it seem that all is well,

When we are exhausted/ burnt out,

And inside we’re screaming for help,

Not the pathway we chose to walk,

Yet it’s where we ended up,

No one understands,

No one recognises our pain,

No matter what, still we care,

There’s never any time to go out

No time to drink or eat,

A cuppa’s supposed to solve everything,

But there’s no magic cure for a carer,

A wife trapped in her bed,

Watches the beautiful roses grow beyond the window,

Whilst a husband watches his beautiful wife,

Slowly fading, time is short, she is broken but still beautiful,

Time waits for no man,

Something unexpected can always go wrong,

You can never have too many cups of tea,

Or too many friends to support,

Your cup may be half empty,

Your cup may be half full,

But which ever way you find it,

It’s usually cold, stale and ready for the sink,

A half eaten sandwich,

A congealed meal that never got eaten,

A call for help answered,

All else forgotten in the moment,

A beloved who loves his coffee,

Snatching a few moments together,

A constant niggling guilty feeling,

Although you desperately needed a break,

Putting ourselves down,

Denying our needs until we fall apart,

Desperately needing support,

We call on Essex Carers Support,

A sense of relief,

Now the load is shared,

Realising you’re not alone,

The group understands how you feel,

Time still ticks relentlessly on,

Reminiscent of Pink Floyd’s lyrics to ‘Time’,

Thinking of dad’s dahlias,

The ones a brother beheaded with a cane,

We want to go in the garden,

Feel the sun upon our face,

There’s never enough time to do it,

Endless jobs that must be done,

No time to iron,

No time to garden,

No time for my hobbies,

Never enough time for me

Time becomes like an hour glass,

Sand slipping through way too fast,

The clocks ticking louder and louder,

Echoing the fear you feel in your heart,

Knowing time is precious,

Trying to make memories that count,

Feeling guilty for longing for a few minutes peace

Always aware that those last moments could be near,

No time to waste,

No time to spare,

No time to rest

Let’s make it the best,

Finding time to say ‘I love you’,

Even if they don’t understand,

Holding their hand,

Making them smile

A carers day is never done

Their nights may be endlessly long,

But when the caring’s over,

There’s an empty chair at the table,

Suddenly you’d give everything,

To make them one more cup of tea,

To hear those repeated stories that drove you mad,

Or to hold them one last time,

For when their time is over,

The memories are all that’s left,

Sitting there in the garden,

Needing a sign to know they’re still with you,

Never be afraid to ask for help,

We really do understand,

Share experiences with other carers,

Come for a cuppa, a chat, and some cake.